1. You spend little on yourself; but with your dog, the sky is the limit.
2. Your free time is focused on your pooch.
3. Your dog gives you commands to follow.
4. The only one getting beauty sleep is your dog.
5. You have to spell out certain words.
6. You spend more time managing your dog’s online presence than your own.
Which leads to the next story . . . .
10 SIGNS YOU LIKE DOGS MORE THAN PEOPLE
1. Your dog eats better than you do—no grains, no GMOs, no preservatives.
2. If you have a significant other, they best give you your sleeping space—no cuddly sleepers need apply. But you will literally hang off the bed if your pup looks comfy.
3. When’s your friend’s birthday again? Not sure. But you know your pup’s birthday and definitely celebrate.
4. When you come home after interacting with any other dogs, you feel guilty. I mean, you don’t want your pup thinking you stepped out on them—you would never!
5. You probably talk some crap about your friends in different company, but God forbid someone utters an ill word about your pup. They’re dead to you. When they say you don’t talk about family, they OBVIOUSLY meant dogs too.
6. You are desensitized to humans getting hurt on TV or in the movies, but if something happens to a dog in any scene, you probably cry, turn it off, or storm out.
7. You may or may not have children of your own, but it really doesn’t matter either way because you have a million and one pictures of your pup on your phone and social media accounts and show them off with pride. You almost don’t even notice the eye-rolling anymore.
8. After a long, hard day when no one else can comfort you, sometimes all you need is a hug from your dog. They always know when you need some love and will never judge you when you’re being a big baby.
9. You have a hundred nicknames for your dog, some may not even be coherent words, just a string of syllables and sound effects. They get it, so who cares if anyone else does.
10. No matter how stressful your work day or how bad that commute home was, it’s always all better when you get that super-excited greeting from your dog. It makes it all worth it.